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Writer's pictureGraeme Stevenson

Why not goats?

Weather update - I have never known so much rain. At least back in Scotland there seemed to be the odd break for some dry weather but it has been absolutely relentless here. I am so relieved that the first thing I did when I bought this house was replace the roof. The consequences of still having the old roof don’t bear thinking about. That being said, I’m still too nervous to actually go up in the loft and look - all the boxes that came from Dundee are sitting empty downstairs waiting for me to move them but for no rational reason I’m too afraid to go up the ladder. Hopefully by the time I write November’s update I’ll have “manned up” and moved them.


At the start of October I finally got hold of a “real” piano so that I could overcome my phobia of them and work on my technique so that I desist from instantly pressing down on the damper pedal as soon as I sit down. It wasn’t actually the piano I had thought I was going to get hold of - I waited too long for the one in the second-hand shop and by the time I had decided to purchase it somebody else had got in before me. On the bright side, a day later the Kulturskole advertised that they were giving away a piano so I didn’t waste any time before getting in touch. I did slightly embarrass myself by asking what the make was - turns out that what I thought was an adjective to describe the state of the piano was in fact a reputable Finnish piano maker. My initial plan had been to have the piano upstairs but this was very rapidly re-evaluated when Bjørn and I went to pick it up so it now sits quite happily in the downstairs lounge (surrounded by empty boxes obviously).


At the start of October I had the pleasure of playing for the Multikor at their short performance of dance songs in Kulturhallen in Sandnessjøen. A tad stressful day as I had a service in Herøy, then the ferry across the water for the concert and then another ferry back again to drive up to Dønnes for a service. My employers were v kind in permitting me to do this but I was petrified that the ferry back would be cancelled. There was a very large turnout from the public and the songs we performed included a rather fun Norwegian Eurovision song (“Optimist”) as well as other classics such as “I Will Survive” and “Dancing Queen”. I was pleasantly surprised when I heard a snippet of a recording of the Dancing Queen. For a brief moment I didn’t realise it was us and during that brief moment I did think how good the piano sounded. That being said for whatever reason I was in a tad grumpy mood and there’s an absolutely appalling picture of me. When you see the bad photos below of me in front of aeroplanes, imagine how bad the one I’m not showing is. And speaking of “grumpy”, I like to think that I’ve introduced this word to the vocabulary of the locals - although sometimes the complete phrase is “he’s doing a ‘grumpy Graeme’” which is not necessarily something to be proud of.


The service in Dønnes was a celebratory service for a number of reasons - 250 years (I think) since the documents were signed to hand the church over from private ownership to the community, 50 years since the last refurbishment and to “unveil” the new lighting/ heating/ sprinkler system. Unfortunately and most definitely unusually for a service celebrating a new heating system, we all shivered our way through the service as the super-duper new heating system obstinately refused to switch on until the service was finished.


I’m delighted to say that as well as a new roof, I’ve now got new windows in my upstairs living room as well now. Inevitably I made a mistake in the ordering and it was slightly more complicated to put in than it should have been but nonetheless we got there in the end. Bjørn, as always, was a fantastic help. And when I say “help”, I of course mean he did almost all the work. I did help remove the old windows (scary) and put the new windows in (absolutely terrifying). It was one thing taking the old ones out - what’s the worse that can happen? You drop them, they break and its just smaller bits to take to the tip. Different kettle of fish with the new ones - drop them and it’s a lot of money to replace them. One of the questions that had been preying on my mind over the last few months was “what does one do about seeing a doctor” on the island? Other than offering to make Bjørn a coffee every 10 minutes, my main task was removing the old insulation and my DIY skills maintained their already low level of competence. I got a splinter under my nail (I’m still shuddering as I type this) and pathetically went to pieces. I got dizzy, broke out in a sweat - completely went to pieces. Einar, a retired GP, rushed to my fevered side to help me through this traumatic time but alas his equipment wasn’t small enough to get it out. So the next morning found me waiting up in the GP office in Solfjellsjøen to be attended to. Of course it only took about 10 seconds when I got there and I must have seemed like a complete wimp to the young lady who attended to me but god it was a relief to get it done.


Despite this “injury”, I did manage to tick off one of my Norwegian bucket list things by completing this year’s Fjelltrimmen on Dønna. This involves going up 10 different hills on the island and filling in the books left there with a date and time. I had finally worked how to get up Urdfjellet which is in Bjørn and with Solveig’s guidance we blitzed the remaining few over a couple of days. V excited about getting my mug and have begun to write my acceptance speech.


At the end of the month I had a fabulous trip up to Bodø with Dønnahorn. They had decided to take part in a wind band competition so we all pottered up there are the end of the month for the weekend. A lot of our travel plans were thrown into disarray with the tragic train crash - not unrelated to the vast amounts of rain we’ve had alas. Obviously the people who had planned to travel by train had to rethink and because it appears there’s only one road heading north we were given the mind - blowing (to me anyway) of either driving via Sweden (!!) or taking the ferry via Nesna. It gives you some idea of how bad the queues for this usually reasonably quiet ferry that the Sweden route was actually given some serious thought. That being said, our inconvenience is nothing compared to the loss for the family of the train driver so that thought kept everything in perspective. In the end it took us 8 hours to get there an 8 hours back. Does seem to be a tad mad to do all that travelling to play for 20 minutes but much fun was had.


The whole competition was run very well and all the change overs were very slick - apart from plugging my keyboard in. I had got everything set up off stage so all I had to do was run on with it, plug it in and voila. Unfortunately the socket they plugged me (well, the keyboard) in to was not working and it was sorted only seconds before Sabine’s first downbeat. Despite the inauspicious start (for me) the band played really well and came off rightly happy with their performance. Forgive the immodesty, but I even got a mention in the critique afterwards - the flautist and I were complemented on our blending which was nice. Course it really just meant that I had turned the volume control to the right spot but we take the compliments when we get them. In the end we only came in 5 points behind the winners - not too shabby when you take into account that the band is from an island of only 1400 inhabitants against bands from places like Bodø with a population of 54000. One can even get medals for participating in these competitions so I’ve asked if we take part again can we get some? I like the idea of many decades from now a descendant of mine asking about the family medals - “tell me about the medals mummy” “well these belonged to William who fought in the Crimean War and the 2nd Opium War with China, this is another William who fought in Sudan, these are Raymond’s from World War 2 and that one is Graeme’s - he came 6th in a wind band competition in North Norway”.


Obviously with only a 20 minute performance and short rehearsal, there was a fair amount of free time - so I took the opportunity to potter round the city and visit the airplane museum again. I had hoped to visit the bunker museum but, as per normal, I hadn’t done any research before arriving in a place and it was too short notice to organise a guide. I’ll know the next time.







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